Cultivating Joy: The Power of Helping Others

Assistance in resonating with the heart

Many people who support and help others often feel they need to put things back on track, approaching the task as if they were fixing a broken object—like repairing a clock to ensure it works properly again.

Parents often adopt the same mindset when taking their children to a therapist, hoping to "fix" them and restore them to normalcy. Alternatively, they may seek therapy for themselves, saying, “I’m here, fix me! I don’t know where I went wrong, but it’s your job to find out. Please examine me carefully, and you’ll uncover my issues. Then, I’ll leave the problems in your hands, and I’ll be healed!” This attitude is quite common between clients and therapists, as if such intervention were effective. When we encounter someone with problems, we can take a completely different approach: revealing truths that have been hidden. Suddenly, the person may see their situation in a new light. In this process, the helper does not provide direct assistance but simply uncovers certain truths. Using this method, it is not the helper who does the real work; it is the new perspective that unfolds. This perspective continues to develop on a deeper, psychological level, encouraging the individual to grow. The process of transformation may take a long time—perhaps a year, two years, or even longer—until suddenly, something shifts. In this context, the helper's role is merely to initiate a process that allows the individual to receive new information. This information does not come from external sources but emerges from within.

Extracted from “Rising in Love” by Bert Hellinger