I Choose to Live for Myself

Where does my resentment come from? Why do I always have a grudge against the people closest to me, and why do I get married and then separated? When Yuzhi sat next to Mr. Schneider, her face showed signs of distress. Mr. Schneider asked, “What brings you here?” Yuzhi replied, “I want to live for myself.” After two divorces, she still doesn’t know who is the right person for her. Her child struggles to get along with their father. Mr. Schneider jokingly said, “Haven’t you always been living like this? Otherwise, why would you be here?” Yuzhi's constellation work revealed hidden dynamics. Her father’s ex-wife lost her husband due to war (and seemingly lost an unborn child as well), which created deep resentment toward Yuzhi’s father. Although Yuzhi had no direct interactions with her, she inherited the family's buried darkness, drawn in by the forces of resentment and sorrow that stirred her marriage and partnerships; she was indeed living unfreely. Mr. Schneider guided her toward reconciling with her father’s ex-wife while also offering sincere apologies to her two former husbands, taking responsibility for her own actions. No one intends to hurt others, but only by respecting the past family history and honestly facing the life force or destructiveness of family legacies can one achieve freedom for themselves and the next generation.