True Love: Accepting Your Loved One's Authentic Self

"Through love, we experience giving and receiving in life; love is a gift." ~Wolfgang Giegerich When we say "I love you", every aspect of a relationship is affected. People often feel shy and uneasy before uttering these sacred words, and rightfully so, as these words should not be spoken lightly. The essence of love is not in fulfilling our desires but in understanding and recognizing ourselves through it. If we continually focus on finding a more compatible partner, we miss out on true love. This constant search only leads to new relationships that have little to do with genuine love. In this pursuit, the flame of love often fades, and love itself becomes depleted. This happens because we are fixated on whether our partner or the relationship meets our preconceived notions and expectations. True love involves being prepared to experience life's highs and lows, joys and sorrows. It means accepting the authentic nature of the person we love, rather than blaming them when things don’t go our way or criticizing them for not being our ideal partner. Real love is about loving everything as it is, without trying to mold it into what we want. Love that comes with specific conditions or settings is not genuine love. We must remember that love is a task that requires us to abandon selfishness. In other words, love cannot be solely about fulfilling our own needs; we must learn how to love genuinely. When we learn to love, we truly feel it, and selfish thoughts disappear. The impact of interactions in a partnership is evident in everyday life. Giegerich also said, "The partner in real life may be different from what we imagined, which puts us in a dilemma. Should our partner match our expectations, or should we accept and love them as they are?" Should our interactions with our partner follow the rules and directions we have set in our minds, or should we learn to accept and respect the natural development of the relationship? If we continually restrict love with preconceived conditions, love will keep testing and challenging our limits.

Extracted from “In guten wie in schlechten Zeiten”

by Wilfried Nelles